First Dan had the dream.
For seven nights.
In the morning he'd tell me he had the dream again, the one where he was trying not to miss the flight.
And then I had the dream.
And we got on a plane to California.
Last Shavuot I wrote about quiet revelations, and the way that miracles - and our destiny manifest over time - sometimes taking years to recognize revelation.
There is nothing quiet about this past year's revelations.
There were visions.
And rebirths and returns and an opportunity that came from across the country.
Sometimes, I'm convinced, that the noise needs to get louder before we know how to act.
To know what is necessary of us in this world.
Pray hardest when it's hardest to pray.
This is the mantra that fills me on days - especially the cold, grey dark ones - that I don't feel like going to my special spot in Prospect Park to say my morning prayers.
I drag myself on those days.
Dear God please bless us keep us and deliver us.
Prayer is a physical act for me, from my chest down my arms, into my hands.
I keep my hands open and and flex my fingers - both an offering and an asking - when I pray.
And I prayed hard this past year.
I knew that Dan and I were on the cusp of something, but I wasn't sure what, and I prayed for God to deliver us in the right direction.
Walking around - for the first time - in the neighborhood where we'll be moving to next month in San Francisco, near the temple where Dan will be Senior Rabbi, I knew I was home.
It unfolded - immediately - with newness but also familiarity, like a memory of the future.
I knew that we didn't end up there by happenstance: we were delivered there.
And this fills me with both comfort and purpose as Dan and I pack up our apartment of the past ten years, and prepare our kids for this adventure ahead.
We'll bring so much of what we've built with all you here, with us.
And we will also leave pieces to continue on here, fueled by your energy and spirit.
Wishing everyone a Shavuot tuned to whatever volume you're in need of to know what's necessary of you in this world.